


Mac and Dee Hate Dennis

by kneephobic



Category: It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
Genre: Gen, High School, Underage Drinking, Underage Drug Use, implied macdennis - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-25
Updated: 2018-10-25
Packaged: 2019-08-07 07:34:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,644
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16404068
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kneephobic/pseuds/kneephobic
Summary: Mac and Dee are drunk and like to throw beer cans at Dennis.





	Mac and Dee Hate Dennis

**Author's Note:**

> this is my first (published) sunny fic! it's also my first published fic in a really long time, so kudos and comments are greatly appreciated <3 find me on tumblr at lesbianrobmcelhenney
> 
> (also the drug use refers to just weed)

It’s a Saturday night, the third one in a row Dennis had passed out on Dee and Mac while drinking. He always was a lightweight, despite his frequent claims that he could probably outdrink his dad. Mac pokes him with a clothes hanger on the nearby floor. No response. 

“He’s out cold…” Mac drunkenly announces, as if it weren’t obvious.

“Seven beers ‘nd one shot of whiskey. Pussy,” Dee says, proud of outlasting her brother. He always tried to one-up her, but this was something he could never beat her at. Dee may only be seventeen, but she could last longer and chug faster than most adults Mac had met.

Mac and Dee are sitting on Dennis’s bedroom floor, like they do every weekend. Sometimes with Charlie, sometimes without. If he wasn’t there, it was almost always because he had already passed out after sniffing a multitude of toxic substances. Mac’s leaning against the bed, where Dennis is blacked out, while Dee is sprawled across the bean bag chair.

They sit in a familiar and comfortable silence. The two of them didn’t talk much, the only reason they hung out with each other because of Dennis, but he always assumed they hated each other, so that's how they acted. Dee did think Mac was kind of an asshole, but he could be alright when they were drunk or high. Mac claimed he couldn’t stand her, but he only ever said that in front of Dennis. 

“Why… why are you here?” Dee’s slurred voice breaks the silence.

“Tha’s a rude question.”

“No, no, I mean like… why d’ya stick around? Like, you choose to hang out with ‘im. If I had a choice, I’d never see ‘im again.” 

“Uh,” Mac tries to think why he stays, when Dennis can be so mean to him and Charlie. He glances over at Dennis’ unconscious body, wondering what he sees in him.

“I guess I don’t. really got a choice either. I got no one else to be friends with,” Mac comes up with.

“No one else wants to be friends with their drug dealer, huh?”

“Guess not.”

Dee doesn’t respond, but she reaches to open a drawer in Dennis’ nightstand and pulls out a half a pack of cigarettes and a lighter. Dennis doesn’t like it when they smoke in his room, especially when they don’t open the window, but neither really care. 

She lights the smoke, breathing deeply. After a few drags, she passes it to Mac.

“Don’t you think Dennis’ll be mad for stealing his smokes?” Mac asks, but inhales anyway.

“We’ll just tell him he smoked ‘em. He’s not gonna remember jackshit.” 

Mac’s only had one drag, but Dee makes grabby hands for the smoke. Mac hands it back, he doesn’t care much for cigarettes anyway.

Dee smokes the rest of it without even offering it to Mac again, but he doesn’t notice. He’s still thinking about her question from earlier.

It's true he has no one else to hang out with, but he’s also never really tried. There was Schmitty, but that didn’t end well. Most people at school just think he’s a douchebag, and that Charlie’s gross. Well, Charlie is gross, but that’s beside the point. No one attempts to talk to him, unless they want weed, so he doesn’t talk to them. Dennis was an exception, though, and Dee follows Dennis everywhere. 

He thinks about what Dee said, too. About how she’d leave him if she could. He knows she can’t really feel like that. She made a choice to be here right now, even though she claimed it was just for the booze and weed, like she did every single weekend.

“You don’t really hate Dennis,” Mac blurts out, without thinking. He usually avoids talking about feelings, even when he’s drunk.

“No, Mac, I definitely do. You think he’s mean to you, yeah? He’s a million times worse to me. And I gotta live with him,” there’s no real malice in her voice, though. Everyone in their friend group is mean to everyone, including Dee. That’s just how they are. In fact, he’s seen Dee punch Dennis in the gut, just because she was mad she didn’t get the lead in the school musical.

“Maybe you think you do, ‘cause it’s easiest. But you don’t have to stay with him at school, or even now. But you do.”

Dee’s face is suddenly solemn. “All we have is each other,” she whispers. “All our damn lives, through every single one of Mom and Dad’s fights, we’ve only had each other. And he still likes to treat me like shit!” Dee glares at Dennis’ back and throws an empty beer can at it. “Fuck you, dickwad.” He doesn’t even stir.

“Sometimes I hate him too. But then he asks me and Charlie over to watch movies or play video games and we just have fun and it’s easy. We don’t talk about shit we don’t wanna, if someone looks like ass, you drink beer. You don't need to talk.” Mac thinks he thinks best when it’s two A.M and he’s had eight beers.

“I know we’re supposed to like, not like each other, but you and me, we get each other,” Dee says as she pulls the last two beers out of their 24-pack. 

“Bottoms up.”

She and Mac chug their beers, and both toss their cans behind them, with Mac’s landing on the side of Dennis’ head.

Dennis mutters something that sounds like “bitch” and flicks the can off his head, passing back out immediately.

Dee and Mac stare at each other, before bursting into laughter. Things are much more funny than they should be at this hour.

“I wish we didn’t chug those,” Mac sighs when the laughter has died down, “I don’t wanna stop drinking.”

“Weed?” Dee suggests, and Mac’s eyes light up.

“Fuck yes.”

“Let’s go outside for it, though. Mom hates the smell of weed,” She doesn’t let him answer, but gets up and opens the door. “I’ll meet you in the backyard, gotta take a piss first.”

Mac nods, and gets up to stretch. He sits on the bed beside Dennis, and just looks at him. It takes him a moment to register what he’s doing, but he doesn’t look away. An urge inside of him wants to touch Dennis’ face, and no one’s there, so he does. He knows it’s weird, but he doesn’t care. Dennis’ face is soft, which is exactly what he expected from a guy who moisturizes every morning and night, but he likes it. He presses a gentle kiss to his cheek, gentle enough Dennis doesn’t wake, and gets up to leave. Before he does though, he tosses Dennis’ comforter onto his body, and watches him curl up in it. 

•••

It’s a lot colder outside than Mac thought it would be. He and Dee hide behind one of the hedges, trying to protect themselves from the wind. Dee is drinking from some flask she stole from her parents liquor cabinet, as Mac’s shaking hands attempt to pack the bowl of his pipe. When it’s full enough, he lights it up, breathing in until it starts to burn, then passing the pipe and lighter to Dee. She hands him the flask.

When he exhales, he already feels lighter, like the world is just a bit more friendly.

They spend a bit just passing the weed and booze back and forth, until the bowl is cashed and it's not so cold anymore.

They sit there for a few moments. They don’t have much to talk about, so Mac just looks at the few stars he can see in the sky, and Dee plays with a twig.

“Mac,” Dee starts, then pauses, unsure how to phrase her sentence, “do you… are you like, gay?”

That immediately ruins his high.

“What the fuck is that supposed to mean! Why the hell would you think that!” Mac yells at her, his face turning red and spittle flying from his mouth.

“Calm down, dude! It’s just a question! It’s just that, you’ve never liked a girl, and… I saw you with Dennis,” she trails off during the last few words, but Mac still heard exactly what she said.

“I have so liked girls! I’ve had girlfriends! And I have no idea what you’re talking about,” he knows precisely what she’s talking about, but tries to pretend not acknowledging it means it never happened.

“You’ve had girlfriends, yeah, but you only asked them out ‘cause Dennis said you should, then you broke up with them like a week later. You never really liked them,” she takes a deep breath, preparing for Mac to yell at her for what she's about to say. 

“I saw you kiss Dennis. On the cheek. And you covered him with the blanket.”

“That didn’t happen,” she can tell Mac’s voice is strained, “none of that happened. I’m not gay. I’m as straight as you can get. Now fuck off,” his voice cracks on the last word, and he storms off back into the house. Dee once again notices how cold it is.

She almost feels guilty for making him so upset, but at the same time, she knows she’s right. She just wonders if this was the best way to go about it. She knows Mac denies everything, why would she expect this to be any different?

She eventually retreats to the house, and sees Mac, curled up and asleep, on the couch in the living room. She sighs and whispers a quiet “sorry” to him, before returning to her own room.

Dee wants Mac to forget about the conversation by morning, but she knows it’s just wishful thinking. The cold sobered them both up enough to have at least semi-clear memories. She just hopes Mac keeps giving her and Dennis weed.


End file.
